dear michelle,

the beds in college dormitories are sized "extra-long", and yet your feet are still sticking off the end and poking the boxes of biscuits on the table. You are extra-extra-long. XXL. And also asleep.
Did you know that human beings elongate when they sleep? 
This is why we are taller in the mornings than we are at night. I can touch the top of the doorframe when i wake up, but not before I go to bed. It has something to do with muscles.

You are also taking up all the blankets in the room, all four of them!
I love you but I am cold.
Your sweet slumber shall be snuffed shortly, and your half your comforters hijacked (One for Hiromi).

but in the morning you will check livejournal and be like, "Oh, trivia! i did not know i could be so long and fat in my sleep" 
and you will forgive me. 



Apologetically,

elaine.